count_de_monet

Wow, I made it back. Just seven months after my last post. Well, obviously this isn't to be a daily journal. Determined not to make it a bi-yearly one. Making progress on how I wanted to improve my life and poker. Not as fast as I would like, but the steps taken are concrete. Should move along much quicker towards my goals now that my intended foundation is just about set. Hell, the foundation is really the goal. The parts of it will just naturally flow from what I have developed. No more work involved other than maintaining and optimizing the system. I know it will work. I am as close to 100% sure as I can be that I am the only one pursuing this path. Into the wilderness!!!

Started an offline journal today. Only the things I did well. Noticing. Becoming more of what I want and tracking the progress.

I've heard education comes from the latin word educare. That educare means to draw forth. As in the Socratic method of learning. The knowledge is within. It may be a delusion but it is a useful one and I will use it. What I want, I already know how to do. Set the mind on the target. Be calm and aware, and let what I think best to do next happen. Adjusting if needed. The more I trust and the more I reinforce the more of it I will get. The mind just works that way.

Supposedly I am hotter than 62% of the men on hotornot.com. I don't know if this is good news or bad. I guess this is what I get asking twenty somethings to rate a 40 year old. The terrors of getting... I just can't type that I am getting... So I won't. ;) I am getting younger every day and can't understand why I don't get carded going into casinos. :---) Maybe I'll try another picture. Maybe a smile would help. I was going for the sexy strong manly look but I guess that didn't work. LOL!

...  The master answered and said, "Once there lived a village of  creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. The current of the river swept silently over them all - young and old, rich and poor, good and evil, the current going its own way, knowing only its own crystal self. Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life , and resisting the current what each had learned from birth."

"But one creature said at last , ' I am tired of clinging. Though I cannot see it with my eyes, I trust that the current knows where it is going. I shall let go, and let it take me where it will. Clinging, I shall die of boredom.' The other creatures laughed and said, ' Fool! Let go, and that current you worship will throw you tumbled and smashed across the rocks, and you will die quicker than boredom!' "

"But the one heeded them not, and taking a breath did let go, and was tumbled and smashed by the current across the rocks. Yet in time, as the creature refused to cling again, the current lifted him free from the bottom, and he was hurt no more. And the creatures downstream, to whom he was a stranger, cried, ' See a miracle! A creature like ourselves, yet he flies! See the Messiah, come to save us all!' And the  one carried in the current said, ' I am no more Messiah than you. The river delights to lift us free, if only we dare let go. Our true work is this voyage, this adventure.' "...  Richard Bach - Illusions

This passage for me is a metaphor about letting go of the methods I have used in my life to get to the point I am now. The qualities I have used within myself to procure what I desire have the the built in limitations to get what I still desire and have not yet acheived.  A new method is required. To get there I have to release the attitudes and perceptions that created the last way.

 

 

 

As I continue on my journey through life I cross many obstacles. Some I stumble on. It is easy at these times to think of other instances where I have failed. To let that be the filter through which I look at the present. But, of course, one never fails unless one gives up. Since I have never done that it means I have been successful of a sort even during those dark times. When I think of a setback I will concentrate on the successful transition to the next step taken from now on. It really is the whole situation, everything has context! I will let my future define my present, whom I would like to become is who I am. The rest is temporary. Change is constant.

Today began another photo reading session. I am going to make this work for me. I want and demand total command of the knowledge I seek. I know this is possible. If others can do it, so can I.

"What lies beyond us and what lies before us are tiny matters when compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Well, like they say. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Been thinking about a diary/journal for quite some time, like...the first forty years of my life. Didn't start working out regularly till thirty-five. Guess I'm a late bloomer.

My goal in life is a simple one, actually two. I want to become the best Poker player the world has ever seen, read, or heard about for now and quite some time into the future. Easy, provided I pursue it within my larger goal of getting the most I possibly can out of myself. For most this would be a very abstract concept. I have defined it more clearly for myself. You have to know exactly what you want in order to get it and I do. This is what I want.

1)Physical Fitness, including Self-Defense art.
2)Optimal Nutrition, geared towards Peak State Enhancement.
3)Robust Social Life. Fun for Everyone! Enjoy what we have to offer each other. Lots of Ladies.
4)Mastery of Mental Mindsets necessary For what I wish To accomplish.
5)Mastery of Verbal and Non-Verbal Communication with ability to guide toward Goal Attainment.
6)Mastery of Necessary Skill Sets and Knowledge - Odds, Strategies, Quick Learning/Memory Techniques, etc.
7)Thoughtful Review and Adjustment to remain on the best path possible to attain what I want.

Hmmm, now that I wrote it down I am getting a feeling of exhilaration! A rush! A feeling that I can really do this. Behind each of those there is a lot left unsaid, believe me each of those has a well defined process for attaining it attached. All have had progress, all have had obstacles dealt with and adjusted to. All have had many possible methods distilled down to the best ones. This process continues.

It is much easier to notice my moving forward when I put it forth like this. Usually the things that go wrong demand the attention. Something I've worked on decreasing with increasing success. I just found a new method! Viewing the whole I get a feeling of completeness with respect to what I need to do to attain my goals. A feeling I have done my research well. An unexpected delight. How nice!